Wednesday, August 03, 2005
Exposition: internal thoughts
Once the writer determines what expository information the reader needs to know and in what measure, the writer can deliver it in one of three ways:
While using the viewpoint character's thoughts to reveal exposition is probably the simplest method, it's also easy to abuse. It's the slippery slope into "author intrusion"--the pit writers fall into when information disengages from the point-of-view (POV) character's thoughts. Every piece of information delivered this way must be unmistakably couched in the character's POV, using tone, word choice, sentence rhythm, and even grammar.
When dramatizing exposition in internal thoughts, here are a few success strategies to consider:
For example, in Frank Peretti's Monster, the first line of exposition--and it is only one line--appears on page 4 in the internal thoughts of the Hunter. While tracking something, he comes upon a body. Using a bulldozer, he tries to make it look like a logging accident.
That one line is the only backstory/exposition in the entire scene. It tells the reader the Hunter went to college, he put himself through school, he isn't afraid of hard work, and he is probably a professional. It's backstory and characterization. But, what makes it interesting is it's plugged into the immediate story via internal conflict. The line suggests the character is slightly uncertain he has what it takes to accomplish his scene goal.
The next time exposition appears in Monster is on page 6. A different scene, a different character. This time the point of view is that of the heroine, Beck. She's listening to her husband go over the details of their planned camping trip, which motivates this passage of internal thoughts:
Exposition takes up almost the entire paragraph, which is unusual in this book. It's worth noting that the earlier one-sentence expository example in the Hunter's viewpoint is about an event many years ago. The six-sentence expository example in Beck's viewpoint is of the near past, from a few weeks to a few hours ago. This gives it a greater sense of immediacy, which helps counterbalance the longer interruption to the story.
Even more importantly, it sustains the reader's interest because all along it's building Beck's internal conflict. While it provides context for the scene and explains what the couple is doing at the park and characterizing Reed and their relationship, it's contributing to her immediate attitude. This exposition, experienced by Beck as immediate thoughts, stir her emotions, and her emotions create a negative attitude making it even more difficult for her to achieve her scene goal.
It's important to understand that while exposition, when dramatized as thoughts, can stir up internal conflict, it doesn't serve as character motivation. After that passage, when Reed says something insensitive and Beck throws him an angry glare, her attitude has worn her down to that point--but Reed's comment (not the backstory or her attitude) is the immediate motivation for Beck's reaction.
Next, dramatizing exposition through dialogue.
(To be continued…)
- Internal thoughts
- Dialogue
- Flashback
While using the viewpoint character's thoughts to reveal exposition is probably the simplest method, it's also easy to abuse. It's the slippery slope into "author intrusion"--the pit writers fall into when information disengages from the point-of-view (POV) character's thoughts. Every piece of information delivered this way must be unmistakably couched in the character's POV, using tone, word choice, sentence rhythm, and even grammar.
When dramatizing exposition in internal thoughts, here are a few success strategies to consider:
- The character needs a logical reason in the present to think about the information from the past. This maintains not only the flow of the story, but also the POV.
- Keep it short; a paragraph is probably too long.
- Exposition explains; it doesn't motivate. If the character takes action afterwards, make sure it's triggered by something more immediate than distant memories.
- Dramatize the exposition by using it to create internal conflict; conflict is what keeps the reader from skipping "the dull parts."
For example, in Frank Peretti's Monster, the first line of exposition--and it is only one line--appears on page 4 in the internal thoughts of the Hunter. While tracking something, he comes upon a body. Using a bulldozer, he tries to make it look like a logging accident.
It had been awhile since his college summers with the construction crew, but if this thing was anything like that track hoe he used to operate...
That one line is the only backstory/exposition in the entire scene. It tells the reader the Hunter went to college, he put himself through school, he isn't afraid of hard work, and he is probably a professional. It's backstory and characterization. But, what makes it interesting is it's plugged into the immediate story via internal conflict. The line suggests the character is slightly uncertain he has what it takes to accomplish his scene goal.
The next time exposition appears in Monster is on page 6. A different scene, a different character. This time the point of view is that of the heroine, Beck. She's listening to her husband go over the details of their planned camping trip, which motivates this passage of internal thoughts:
She'd been trying to pay attention and even scare up a little enthusiasm all during their long drive, or as Reed called it, "Insertion into the Survival Zone." They'd had a nice picnic lunch--"Preexcursion Rations"--on a log, and even now--at "The Final Briefing" on the hood of their car--she was doing her best to match Reed's excitement, but it was hard to be interested in how many miles they would hike, the hours it would take to get there, the trail grades they would encounter, and their available physical energy. This whole adventure was never their idea in the first place, but his. He was so into this stuff. He'd picked out all the gear, the boots, the backpacks, the maps, the freeze-dried apricots and trail mix, everything. He let her choose which color of backpack she wanted--blue--but he chose which kind.
Exposition takes up almost the entire paragraph, which is unusual in this book. It's worth noting that the earlier one-sentence expository example in the Hunter's viewpoint is about an event many years ago. The six-sentence expository example in Beck's viewpoint is of the near past, from a few weeks to a few hours ago. This gives it a greater sense of immediacy, which helps counterbalance the longer interruption to the story.
Even more importantly, it sustains the reader's interest because all along it's building Beck's internal conflict. While it provides context for the scene and explains what the couple is doing at the park and characterizing Reed and their relationship, it's contributing to her immediate attitude. This exposition, experienced by Beck as immediate thoughts, stir her emotions, and her emotions create a negative attitude making it even more difficult for her to achieve her scene goal.
It's important to understand that while exposition, when dramatized as thoughts, can stir up internal conflict, it doesn't serve as character motivation. After that passage, when Reed says something insensitive and Beck throws him an angry glare, her attitude has worn her down to that point--but Reed's comment (not the backstory or her attitude) is the immediate motivation for Beck's reaction.
Next, dramatizing exposition through dialogue.
(To be continued…)
